Change

I've discovered that I am quite a creature of habit. I thrive on routine and love knowing what to expect from my day, my week, my future. That's why the most recent change in our lives is such a biggie for us.

As of the beginning of October S will be resigning from his position at LCC and will go to work for Brad Neal, a financial planner here in town. Six months ago we set up an appointment to have him take a look at our retirement, life insurance, etc. Apparently from that meeting S made such a good impression on Brad that he began pursuing him to come work for him.

S will be assisting Brad with various duties and tasks involved in the business and will begin working on further education to get the licenses he needs for the job. S really liked what he did at LCC and we've always said if he were to leave there, God would have to drop something in his lap. I never imagined that would actually happen!

It has been a mix of fear, sadness and excitement as we've made this decision. I love lists so here we go:

What excites us about this opportunity:

-Brad is a Christian and views his work as a ministry. He serves a lot of ministers and missionaries and provides affordable services for people like us who live on a tight budget. S is excited to be able to help people stretch what God has given them and save for their future.

-We've heard nothing but positive things about Brad. I've been amazed at how many unsolicited comments we've heard from people lately about what a man of integrity he is.

-It fits so well with S's giftedness. He has such a business mind and is so good with all things finance. And yet his gentle, genuine, patient spirit is so beneficial when working with people so it's a perfect blend for this type of job.

-The sky's the limit! There is so much potential for professional and personal growth as he continues learning and developing.

-God has affirmed every step of this process. We kept praying that He would send up red flags or close doors if this was not supposed to happen. Every time we prayed that, He just kept opening one more door until finally we felt like He was pushing us through it!

-Brad has been so specific in relieving our fears and worries. We've had several candid conversations with he, his wife and his secretary and all our concerns have been answered and put to rest.

Of course we are sad about not being quite as connected to the community at LCC as we have been. Sometimes I wonder why it seems that God is separating us from so many of our friends right now. But we feel confident that this is the new journey God has marked for us and it's time for us to embark.

Keep us in mind if you ever need some insurance or financial planning!

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The Case of the Missing Underwear

W is two and a half, recently potty trained and a boy. All those factors combined means that I have long ago quit battling trying to get him to wear clothing on the bottom half of his body when he doesn't want to. It destroys my serenity and I never win anyway.

So yesterday after lunch was no different than most days when he ran screaming from the bathroom after going potty but before putting his underwear back on. Knowing the futility of engaging in the chase, I half-heartedly threw his underwear at him as I walked through the living room and returned to the kitchen to finish my lunch.

A few minutes later after a noticeably mysterious silence he entered the kitchen (still pant-less) saying, "Mommy? More pants? Mommy? More pants?" Figuring he was finally ready to cover his derrière I went searching for the underwear only to discover them completely out of sight.

After checking all the usual hiding spots: under the couches, behind the pillows, in the toilet, I began wondering if now we had added a new twist to our daily ritual. However, as I continued searching, it was not snickering and giggling I heard from W (as I'd expected to hear) but instead an increasingly feverish, "Mommy? Where pants go? MOMMY?! WHERE PANTS GO?!" The poor kid really didn't know what he had done with his underwear and in typical toddler fashion, because he COULDN'T have
them, he wanted them NOW!

I finally convinced him that a new pair of Lightning McQueen pants would just have to do until the mystery pair decided to show themselves. A few minutes later Super Sleuth Detective Daddy sauntered into the living room and casually said, "What's that lump under the carpet?"

Under the area rug in our living room, smack dab in the middle, lay a little lump of toddler undies.

Don't ask me how they got there.

Don't ask me how he could not have known where they had gone.

But let me tell you...you would have thought we had just found a million dollars under our carpet from the way that little boy reacted.

So we have officially decided...no more presents at birthday or Christmas. All we need to bring excitement to our child is an area rug and a long lost pair of underpants.

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Goodbye

I've never been very good at saying goodbye. Apparently God thinks now is a good time for me to get better at it because I've been having to do it a lot lately. Our friends and youth minister who we've worked with for 7 years are moving to Kansas. Hubbie's long-time childhood friend and his wife are moving to Taiwan. My closest friend here in town with whom I share a deep heart connection is getting married and moving out of state. Of course we're happy about all of these exciting transitions our friends get to make but being the ones left behind isn't exactly fun.

I'm also stepping out of my position counseling at Living Hope so I can add a second day counseling with Lincoln Pastoral. It just makes sense to not make the drive anymore with gas prices being what they are. Plus I'll be able to spend more time at home with my kids which is where my heart is primarily invested at anyway.

It's been harder than I thought it would be to say goodbye to my clients there. For some of my long-term clients, although our relationship has been professional, it's been intimate. Sharing dark corners of your life with someone brings an element of vulnerability to even the most clinical of relationships.

I've been a little surprised at how awkward many of my "last sessions" have been. I'd gotten so used to saying, "See you in a week," that I wasn't sure what to say instead. "Have a good life" seems just a bit too final. But for many, it will be the last time I see them in this life.

Part of the privilege I've had in working at Living Hope is that many of my clients are Christians. It has been such a blessing to be able to pray with and for my clients, wrestle with tough spiritual issues and consult the Holy Spirit together when we're stuck.

As awkward as it is saying goodbye to these clients it's comforting to know that the Great Counselor is still very much a part of their lives. I feel a sense of peace in knowing that perhaps the next time I see these people, I won't see broken, wounded souls. I'll see them made new, complete, whole. Free from trauma, liberated from binding habits, made perfect by the blood of Christ.

"See you in a new life..."

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I love CVS

OK, so it's time for me to go public with my little addiction as of late. My friend tipped me off to this blog that details how, through doing some clever couponing, you can get great, no, impossibly amazing, deals at CVS. I've never really liked our CVS because it's old and dingy and the lighting is scary but we're getting a brand new building and after learning "the system" I'm totally addicted to the deals I've been getting there.

For example, I got everything in the below pic for...

drumroll please...

40 CENTS! Yes, you read it right folks, 40 cents. It takes some time and research to figure out how to do this but if you're curious you have to check it out!

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More recent pics of the kiddos...

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Too funny

As seen on the advertisement board outside our local hardware store:

"TOILET BLOW OUT SALE"

Tell me that's not funny.

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I wish God had podcasts

Wouldn't that be great?
Going for that morning jog or walk and need something to keep your mind occupied? Headed for that long commute to work? Need His advice in making a difficult decision? Want to tune out a screaming toddler? Waiting for reassurance that everything is going to be OK?
Just download today's podcast, sync up to ipod and go!
If only, huh?

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My new book

Pottytraining has a way of making you feel like you are the most incompetent parent in the world. Really. I've taught him how to eat, how to walk, and he's even getting pretty darn good at saying the alphabet. How hard can it be to teach someone that their pee and poop go in the toilet, not in their pants?
I wake up in the morning actually dreading the day because of the battles I know I'm going to face that day from the time he wakes up in the morning to the time he goes to bed. Oh the DRAMA: the whining, the crying, the temper tantrums.
And then there's all the carrying on that W does too!
I'm not proud of what I have resorted to over the course of the past two weeks to get this child with an iron will to sit on the potty. You name it, I've bribed with it.
Last night after I had vented my frustrations at full blast to hubby I was trying to unwind with some parental reading before bed. He looked at me and said, "Why do you read books like that before bed? It just makes you feel bad because our kids don't do what the book says they should be doing and then you don't sleep."
Oh wise one. How true are your words.
So we decided we are going to write a book about all the terrible, frustrating, abnormal things kids do so that moms out there like me actually feel better about their own kids after they read it. Anyone care to contribute?

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Mad TV Bob Newhart Skit - Mo Collins - Stop it

I went to a workshop today on Motivational Interviewing: Overcoming Client Resistance to Change. This video is what we learned NOT to do.

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The Item

Garage sales are a funny thing. Every year my sister has a garage sale along with several other families from her neighborhood. Throughout the year I stow away items that we don't use anymore, don't like anymore or have been replaced by the bigger, better and newer version. In the weeks before her sale I dig out all the tubs I've been stowing in and go through it to price things and try to make my junk look at least somewhat attractive. I always find it amazing how many picture frames I pull out of those tubs. I'm beginning to think they mate and multiply in the dark confines of their Rubbermaid tubs.
The saying, "One man's trash is another man's treasure" is proven correct every year at this sale. There always seems to be at least one Item that I nearly throw away as I pull it from the tubs thinking, there's no way someone is really going to buy this...and I'm pretty embarrassed to even include it among my trash. But then I remember the previous year's Item and I slap a ridiculous price on it just to see if this year will follow suit with all the others.
This year The Item was...drumroll please...a bag of used pacifiers. Now let me explain before you think I'm totally sick and truly just out to make a buck. Well, I might be out to make a buck, but I'm not totally sick. Neither of my kids ever liked pacifiers. W preferred his thumb from birth, much to my dismay. No pacifier ever stayed in his mouth for longer than the time it took for him to effectively stain any outfit I ever wore as soon as I picked him up, which was about two seconds. We tried about 6 different types of pacifiers with him, all were adamantly refused. I saved them for baby #2 which she clearly did not appreciate. I couldn't even get them in her mouth because of the superior tongue thrust she developed when I'd come within two feet of her mouth with one. We even bought about 4 more different kinds until finally she will at least occasionally tolerate one type. (I think she really only takes it to pacify me!) Of course it's the biggest ugliest pacifier on the market. No little pink bling-bling pacifiers for my sweetie.
All this to say, this bag of pacifiers had hardly been used so after conferring with my sister about whether or not to actually try to sell these I slapped $2 on them and sheepishly pulled them out the morning of the sale.
Less than an hour later someone came up to me and said, "Are these $2 each?" I'm embarassed to say I actually was trying to read whether or not she'd be willing to pay $2 each before I told her the truth and pocketed her $2. It just goes to show you never know what someone might be willing to buy. Now I can rest assured knowing the pacifier frustrations I endured have come to peace and some other little suckling mouth might find comfort in ways my children couldn't.
I just hope she sterilizes them.

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Check it out

: OK, I found these two websites that are just so cool I have to share with y'all. First is e-mealz. It's a meal-planning service that provides you weekly meal plans complete with shopping lists based on which grocery store you usually do your shopping at. Since they base the meals on what's on sale that week at your store you save money, not to mention the time of not having to think up what you are going to make for dinners that week. If you're like me I HATE planning meals and have been known to sit at the kitchen table for an hour staring at my recipe box trying to plan meals. So if you're the cook in your family, check it out.
Also, check out pandora. It's a music website that creates a radio station playlist for you based on what your favorite artists or songs are. You just type in what your favorite artist is and it starts playing songs by that artist or by different artists that have a similar sound. I can't be on my computer anymore without listening to it, it's fabulous!
Anyway, just a couple fun things I wanted to share.

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Rose

The age old question of "Why do bad things happen to good people?" is pounding in my head this week. My friend delivered a stillborn baby this weekend after her water broke at 21 weeks gestation. I have found myself wrestling with all the stages of grief as I've been reading the updates on what they have had to deal with. My friends gave their baby the middle name Rose and I've been reflecting on what a perfectly symbolic name that is for suffering such a major loss.
With spring coming all the stores have been advertising rose bushes and it has been a constant reminder to me to pray for my friends. I was thinking about how a rose bush is such an appropriate metaphor for tough life situations. They look so prickly and ugly in the stores. You wonder how something so stubby and rough could ever produce something beautiful. But when you take a rose bush home, plant it, care for it, nurture it, from it comes a gorgeous, fragrant, breathtaking flower. Sure it will always have it's thorns. Adversity always leaves scars, painful memories. But the flower, the beauty that comes from those prickly stems is what people stop to notice.

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Just a couple pics of the reasons I haven't blogged in a while!

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Baby Girl

Well, the newest member of our family has arrived! She came two weeks early and it is so strange to me thinking I could still be pregnant right now. Even though it's only been a week since she was born it's already hard to remember what life was like without her. Life feels a little unbalanced after the arrival of a newborn. And yet in other ways life has never felt more balanced. Every day brings new realizations of the losses and gains that ripple through our family because of a tiny 6 lb baby.

What I've lost:
-some sleep
-temporary use of my stomach muscles
-some weight
-some "me" time
-being able to give W my undivided attention
-my previous daily routine

But more importantly, what I've gained:
-pink, pink and more pink
-joy in watching W show unprompted physical affection towards his baby sister
-a fierce desire to protect and provide for my children
-a new respect for hubby as he shows a charming tenderness towards his baby girl
-a sense of completeness
-a renewed awe of God's creativity that can only come from gazing at the tiny fingers of a newborn
-a tremendous responsibility that I can only carry with the help of our Great Creator.

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The Natural

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Daily

My friends J&A have a photo blog called "Not As Daily." Tonight I was reflecting on things that feel very daily and things that feel not so daily. I like the not so daily things much better. Here's my thoughts on the differences:

Things that feel very daily:
-washing my face and flossing my teeth
-saying no and finding a fun distraction when W asks to watch Elmo again(actually that's more like 23 times daily)
-trying to think of healthy things to serve for meals that all of us would like to eat
-hunting for W's fuzzy (his blanket that he can't do without and often leaves in remote corners of the house)
-figuring out what W and I (and sometimes hubby) should wear

Things that feel not so daily:
-being underbudget on my Wal-Mart bill
-hearing a client say, "You know, something we talked about last week really made me think differently about..."
-catching up with old friends when it feels like no time has passed at all since we've seen each other last
-watching the reflections of the round, gold communion trays dance on the vaulted ceilings of our church during a warm and glowing Christmas eve service
-watching W imitate us by pretending to drink juice from our empty plastic communion cups knowing that in some way he is already participating in worshiping Jesus
-having trouble sleeping on Christmas Eve even after all these years

Merry Christmas and blessings in your New Year!

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W-isms

Just thought I'd share a couple W stories that have made us chuckle the past couple days. Stacy brought home the cartoon version of Narnia and although W didn't seem all that interested he must have been particularly impressed with the scene where Aslan goes around breathing life into the characters turned into stone by the witch. We saw him yesterday going around to a bunch of inanimate objects in our house putting his mouth close to them and making a growling/breathing noise on them. How disappointing it must have been to him that the refrigerator did not in fact come to life!
We've also been working on prepping him for the baby coming next month. We'll talk about the baby, pretend with a play baby and read stories about being a big brother. Then today at breakfast hubby asked him, "W, do you want a baby brother or a baby sister?" He paused, said, "hmmm..." Then he pointed to our dog and said, "I want doggy!" Uh oh. He could be in for quite a surprise.

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Little White Hook

We live in a small house. It is tight, it is often cramped and there are some days that I think I will tear my hair out having to look at our full to the brim closets. But it is also very cozy, very warm and I love it. We renovated the house when we moved in so the flooring, paint, cabinets, hardware, etc. is all stuff I got to pick out. It has become home in a way that makes me feel safe, comfortable and I know I will grieve when and if we do move into a bigger house someday.
For example, the bathroom. There is only one and it is not much bigger than a postage stamp. I can reach all four walls while sitting on the toilet. Hubby installed something today that seems insignificant and most people would never notice: a tiny white plastic towel hook on the back of our already white bathroom door. It blends in so well you'd think it's been there for years. But as I brushed my teeth tonight before bed, it caught my eye and suddenly that bathroom felt smaller than ever before.
You see, the reason we installed that hook is because we only had three spots to hang bath towels before. Two towel rods that he and I hang our towels on, and another hook to hang W's towel on. We've been saying for months now that with this new baby coming we need to install another hook for baby's towel and today for whatever reason he actually remembered to pick one up at Wal-Mart and put it up.
It's not like this is the first preparation we've made for the baby. We've been cleaning and prepping and washing and unpacking baby things for some time now. But hanging that permanent little hook on our door today made all this seem so...permanent. I can't help but take a deep breath when I think about the reality of all this. I can't help but question, "How will I handle having to divide my time between two children and a husband all with very specific needs?, How will W adapt and adjust to not being the main and only attraction anymore?, How will I adapt again to sleeping in three hour increments?, How will I get a shower every day?" If I let myself think too long about it suddenly that little white hook becomes quite intimidating.
But tonight that little white hook brought a smile to my face and a giddy-ness to my heart that can only be described as the anticipation a child has the night before Christmas morning. I know realistically that the adjustment won't always be as fun as getting to open that huge shiny present under the tree just for you. I know some days I won't get to shower. But I feel certain that the first time I hang this baby's towel on that little white hook I will be reminded of God's faithfulness, His grace and His blessing in allowing us the pleasure of needing one extra hook.

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Human Tetris

Saw this on Ellen the other day and thought it was so funny I had to share...

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Halloween

We had such a fun time this Halloween. I feel slightly guilty that I was so excited for a pagan holiday but it was just so fun to teach W about costumes and trick-or-treating and pumpkins and candy...plus it means Thanksgiving and Christmas are just around the corner! We were at Wal-Mart over a month ago and thought we'd check out the costumes. The first aisle we went down, the first costume we saw was Elmo and when W pointed to it beaming shouting, "ELMO!" I knew it was coming home with us. But alas, when we got home he would have nothing to do with putting it on his body. He'd hug it, he'd kiss it, he'd carry it around with him but never, never would he allow us to put it on him. We had a couple brief moments over the course of the month when we'd get it over his head for about two minutes but just as soon as he put it on he'd want us to take it off him. So I had serious doubts about whether he would really be Elmo for Halloween or whether he would be a toddler dressed in red carrying an Elmo costume.
The night of Halloween I thought maybe if he saw us handing out candy at the door to kids wearing costumes he'd get the idea but even that did not have an effect on his stubborn will. Finally in desperation and in my sweetest sing-song voice I said, "W, if you put Elmo on I'll give you some yum-yum's!" (his word for m&m's) I couldn't believe how quickly he dove into that costume! Seriously, that's all it took? Why didn't I try that an hour ago? Anyway, we thought we'd test the waters by taking him across the street to our neighbor's house before driving all over Lincoln to show him off. I armed him with his little pumpkin pail that we had been using to hand out candy to the trick-or-treaters who came to visit us and he journeyed off with Daddy to learn the wonders of getting free candy. They were over there for quite a while so I began wondering what the hold up was. When they came back, hubby told me that when our neighbors held out their candy bowl, W tried putting his candy from his pail into their bowl! It didn't take him long to figure out how trick-or-treating is supposed to work though because by the time we got to the next house he was eagerly grabbing as much as his little hands would hold. We went to four or five more houses that night and I couldn't believe he left that costume on the whole night. What wonders candy can work!

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